And, they say real relationships are an endlessly repeated rhythm of harmony, disharmony and repair.
But our culture idealizes only the harmony phase, and so do many that are in a relationship.
"Oh, there's Mike and Sue, they've been married 39 years, aren't they cute."
Of course they separated at one point for nearly a year because they were so pissed off at each other, and periodically they fight intensely, but they always find their way through it.
That's not what you see on the outside.
How are we going to get through this together, is the question that matters to me.
Much of it is about boundaries...the space between two people is where most of the work and reward of a relationship exists.
That's the place my communication comes from,
how well can I love someone else, do I feel safe enough to be myself.
Obviously, if you're not heard in your relationship, breakdown will happen.
If your partner feels they know best, then your voice will always be taken lightly.
Yet, if you find someone that wants to Partner (a collaborator), who believes in you without competition
it's better than winning the Powerball.
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